It was not MY child who tried to show me how to "pee pee" standing up, and then, after hearing an explanation of why girls (including mommy) do not stand up to pee pee, loudly pronounced to anyone who would listen "Daddy doesn't have a penis, he pee pees like mommy!"
It was also not MY child who had to be carried out of the dollar tree kicking and screaming because he could not have a piece of candy. It was also not my child who used a noise maker (like at a football game) in the middle of that same store. My children always behave like little angels in public.
Finally, it was not MY child who had a choclate covered doughnut for breakfast today because mommy was in a hurry to get to work. They always eat well-balanced meals. Plus, I wouldn't actually buy chocolate doughnuts.
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